|
Parents should be aware of the signs their child is being bullied, or may be a bully. Halifax Regional Police aims to make our schools safe for our children, and need your help.
Why Do Children Become Bullies?
- Someone else - perhaps a parent or sibling - is picking on them.
- Someone bigger and stronger is pressuring them into being a "tough" person.
- They think the world revolves around them.
- They are looking for attention, sometimes negative attention is better than no attention at all.
- They have family problems.
- They have no true friends and feel lonely.
- They feel bad about themselves and want others to feel bad also.
- They feel insecure, and bullying makes them feel powerful.
- They want classmates to think they are strong and in control.
- They don’t care or think about other people’s feelings.
How can you tell if your child is being bullied?
Be concerned if your child...
- Is frightened of walking to/from school or is unwilling to go to school.
- Begs to be driven to school or changes his/her route to school.
- Begins to do poorly in school.
- Comes home regularly with belongings destroyed or missing.
- Has unexplained cuts or bruises, stops eating or begins to have nightmares.
- Becomes withdrawn, distressed or suicidal.
What can you do if your child is being bullied?
- Listen and be supportive - take bullying seriously!
- Reassure your child that it isn’t his/her fault.
- Ask how they’ve been dealing with the bullying.
- Talk about what actions you can both take to solve the problem.
- Promise to consult your child before taking any action.
- Talk to school administrators and ask what they can do to help.
- Suggest the school contact the bully’s parents.
- Ask that bullies be kept after school until other children have left.
- Encourage the school to develop a "no bullying" policy, if they don’t already have one.
- Contact your school’s liaison officer, or call 490-SAVE for help.
How can you help your children deal with bullying?
- Ask your child to try to ignore the bully, tell the bully to stop and then walk away if bullying starts.
- Encourage your child to tell a trusted adult - explain this isn’t ‘squealing’ - your child has a right to be safe.
- Help your child develop a list of trusted adults they can phone or go to for help.
- Arrange to meet your child, if the bullying is happening on the way to/from school.
What can you do if your child is bullying?
- Stay calm.
- Don’t bully or hit your child - it will make the situation worse.
- Try to find out why your child is behaving this way.
- Explain that bullying is wrong and try to get your child to understand what it’s like for the victim.
- Talk about how your child might stop bullying and show them how to get along with others without bullying.
- Praise your child when he/she interacts appropriately with others.
- Set realistic, firm guidelines to help your child control behaviour.
- Talk with a teacher, guidance counsellor or principal at your child’s school.
- Model non-violent behaviour at home. If appropriate, consider an anger management program for yourself and your child.
- If the situation is serious, enlist the help of a counsellor or psychologist.
Our Bullying Hotline has expanded!
Call 490-SAVE (490-7283)
Text 233-SAVE
Email bullyhotline@halifax.ca
The Bullying Hotline was established under the direction of the Community Relations/Crime Prevention Section in September 1999. Calls. texts and emails are answered from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. each day, with an answering machine taking messages after hours and on weekends.
Who can call?
- Students - You don’t have to leave your name, call when you want...you don’t need permission to call.
- Parents and Teachers - Can call the line for assistance if they have concerns about bullying in school or in their homes.
Reasons to call
- If there is a bully in your school or class that causes bad feelings toward you or a friend.
- If you know a fight is going to happen and where.
- If you think you may be a bully and don’t know who to talk with for help.
What will happen when you call?
- Police will not ask for your name, but if you call after hours and want a call back, please leave your name and number.
- The bully team will listen and talk with you.
- If there’s a fight, police will respond by calling the school, and try to talk with the people involved before the fight takes place.
- A meeting or mediation between the victim and bully, with teachers and parents present will take place.
Tips on How to Deal with a Bully
1) Walk Tall - Try not to act scared. Practice ‘walking tall’ with shoulders back and head held high.
2) Develop Self-Confidence - Be positive. Learn new skills. Get involved with people and activities that make you feel good about yourself. Remember, everyone is good at something!
3) Start a School Program - Make sure you school has an anti-bullying program with tips on dealing with bullies. If not, talk to your teacher or principal about starting one.
4) Tell a Friend - Always tell a friend or an adult you trust about the bullying. Having someone on your side will help you stand up for yourself.
5) Walk Away - If possible, ignore the bully or say "NO" and walk away. The bully is seeking attention.
6) Ignore the Teasing - Try not to react to bullying and teasing. If you act like you don’t care, the bully might get bored and give up.
7) Don’t Fight Back - The most dangerous thing you can do when confronted by a bully is fight back. Bullies are generally stronger than their victims. By fighting back, you could make matters worse.
8) Give Up Your Possessions - If the situation is dangerous, if the bully is bigger and stronger than you, or if he has a weapon, then it would be smart to give him what he wants. Material things can be replaced - you cannot.
9) Stick With Others - Try not to be alone in places where you could be unsafe - an empty schoolyard, a dark alleyway or a school washroom. If possible, stick with a group. Bullies tend to pick on those who are alone.
10) Remember, Bullies Have Feelings Too - Try to see beyond the bully’s scary face and words and think about what is missing in his life to make him act so cruelly.
|
